Thursday, 24 December 2009
Wednesday, 23 December 2009
MM and DD insisted I wear my Buff to keep my neck warm.
It wasn't my neck I was worried about getting chilled - my fuzzy little plums were freezing when I was posing for these pictures!
Saturday, 19 December 2009
I know that Santa Paws isn’t real, but for their sake I go along with it, so here’s my list...
1. To wake up and find I’m sharing my basket with Fifi, the hot Westie who lives across the road.
2. A convertible sports car, so I can sit in the front seat and feel the wind in my fur without having to stand on the door handle to stick my head out the window.
That’s it. That’s all I ask for - two things.
Of course, with my luck and owners I’ll probably end up with yet another embarrassing jacket that I’ll have to ‘accidentally’ rip to shreds on a bramble bush....
Monday, 14 December 2009
Every morning for the past week MM has dragged me out of my basket at quarter to six for a half hour walk in the freezing cold before she goes to that ‘Work’ place that she never seems to be away from.
I don’t know what kind of kicks she gets from these early morning outings, but it isn’t doing my mood any good.
Then DD hangs around the house all day and keeps me awake, when all I want to do is sneak into their bedroom and make myself comfy on their quilt.
Have they never heard the expression 'Let Sleeping Dogs Lie'?!
Sunday, 6 December 2009
Anyway, MM showed me this calendar the other day.
She tells me they’ve been photo-shopped.
I have no idea what that is, but it looks pretty painful.
Saturday, 28 November 2009
I'm cringing already, but felt I had to show it so you know what MM does to me in the name of entertainment. I only agreed not to bite her because she convinced me it would cheer DD up while he can't ride his new bike himself.
At least she didn't force to me to wear those embarrassing lycra shorts that he's so fond of….
Sunday, 22 November 2009
'World's Saddest Dog'.
So, why is he such a hero to me?
Well, a pooch pal of mine has a cousin who knows old Newmie and tells me that deep down he's really a happy, little chap. He just practises that face for when his humans leave him alone and it gets him all the love and attention he needs.
That's one seriously clever canine.
Friday, 13 November 2009
Generally, I like to wait until she's relaxing on the sofa before I launch my attack; as you can see from this picture.
It may look as though she's fighting me off, but actually she thoroughly enjoys the whole thing.
Monday, 9 November 2009
Here I am alert and ready for action as I look after DD while he's poorly.
You can see his pyjamas in the corner of the picture - as usual he's taking up more than his fair share of sofa.
I'm actually only pretending to be sleeping to avoid having to give him mouth-to-mouth or some other revolting, human medical manoeuvre.
Saturday, 31 October 2009
Before I could say ‘Organic Pork’ we were back in the car and heading home; the smell of that succulent sausage getting fainter and fainter as we went further down the motorway.
In comparison the chew stick I got instead was just one step up from something stolen from the bin! Not that I’d ever lower myself to stealing from the bin, of course...
Friday, 30 October 2009
I’ve got my booster on Saturday, so am already practising a slight whimper for when the needle goes in. If I do it well enough MM feels so sorry for me that she takes me for lunch.
She also has to take the dreaded V.E.T (I hate saying the whole word) a sample of my puppy piddle, so we should have some fun with this one!
Last year, I spend about half an hour dodging them - and their plastic bowl - before giving in because I was starting to feel bad about the way the neighbours were laughing at them.
Saturday, 24 October 2009
Being dragged out in gale force winds and driving rain is doing nothing for me and my reputation in the area as the canine Brad Pitt.
It also doesn't help when MM insists I wear this jacket...
But then, you should see the one she wears. And she calls herself stylish?!
Wednesday, 21 October 2009
I mention this, because I already have a couple of kitties on board and unlike a lot of the canines I know, I’m fond of my feline friends.
No-one can carry off ‘aloof’ like a cat can and you have to admit that their attention to detail when it comes to cleanliness is pretty impressive.
To demonstrate, here is a picture of my puss pal, Ginger, incorporating yoga and a morning wash on the sunroof of our neighbour’s car.
Now, I’m no stranger to yoga myself and can manoeuvre a pretty magnificent ‘downward dog’ - for maximum attention and a guaranteed tummy rub, this is best accompanied by a loud, long yawn.
But just take a look at Ginger!
You’d have to go to the Kirov Ballet to see a better leg extension than that.
Saturday, 17 October 2009
Usually I’m quite a clever canine, but a conversation with DD has got me confused.
Most days, MM & DD leave me for a few hours and go to Work. They’ve done this for years and although they take me almost everywhere with them, they don’t take me there.
Why not? Is it too far away? Would I have to go on the train (I hate the train)? If it’s so nice that they feel the need to go there all the time, why don’t we just live there?
Today, DD throws another location at me that I’ve never been to. Hospital...
Apparently, he’s going there on Monday for a while and I can’t go with him. Last year, MM went there for over two weeks and didn’t even come back with a tan! Actually, she looked awful when she got back and didn’t seem to have enjoyed herself at all, so I really can’t understand why DD would want to go.
Is this the start of separate holidays each year? And if so, can I get to go to The Barking Bedgebury when it’s my turn?
Monday, 12 October 2009
I love this time of year.
The sun is low and bright, bringing out the best tones in my fur and it’s cool enough to enjoy long, leisurely strolls without getting sweaty paws.
But best of all, there are fallen leaves everywhere.
Little clumps of them are just perfect for picking up and dropping off your pee-mail and if you’re lucky enough to come across a load of them in a big pile, dive in and snuffle under them for a while. Bliss!
Be warned though... Only dive in if they are dry!
Wet, sticky and stinky leaves are like yellow snow - best avoided!
Thursday, 8 October 2009
I live with two people who see no shame in calling themselves Mutty Mummy and Doggy Daddy...
Add to this the fact that they make up songs about me, then force me to sit listening to them while they wail tunelessly and it’s enough to make a dog barf up his Bonio. It also highlights their complete lack of consideration when it comes to the sensitivity of my much heightened hearing.
But they love me (deep down in my little doggy heart, I love them too) and have decided that at the grand old age of seven, I’m mature enough to have my very own Dog Blog - to not only air my furry frustrations, but also to record my dreams, my disappointments, my dinners and my days out.
Well, I will start recording them just as soon as I master this keyboard / computer stuff; paws and technology are a tricky combination.
If I'm honest, I’d never have agreed to this if I’d known the ‘mouse’ was a fur-less, clicky thing that sits on a plastic mat. What’s the point if you can’t chase it and then hide it in your basket for a midnight snack?